Last week I wrote about why babies biting and how you can deal with the behaviour. This week I'll discuss toddler biting. Common causes are: teething, inappropriate play and attention seeking.
Babies grow into toddlers and most toddlers continue to have teething bouts. Teething may cause your child some discomfort and/or pain that is often reflected in their behaviour. They may display clinging behaviour; want to be picked up a lot; and whinge/cry all at the same time. Their lips and gums are usually more red in colour and they may dribble. They may not be interested in eating either. Biting may relieve teething discomfort; unfortunately toddlers don't discriminate between things and people. In my experience, some children teeth easily and some children have difficulty. What a pain in the gum! You may want to consider toddler pain relief or teething gel SM33 (sold by pharmacies).
Initially biting can be a game. A parent allows a few nips here and there, then it develops into a problem. In this situation, I recommend words with action. Do not let a nip pass you by without a firm "NO BITING". Followed immediately by you gently, but firmly, pushing the child away. The biting can easily escalate, especially when the child is tired and/or frustrated.
Attention Seeking can also motivate biting. If your child is a known biter and is playing with siblings, you need to anticipate what can happen in play. Watch, listen and prepare to move in as needed. Try not to wait for the scream from the victim. If you missed the moment and need to deal with the trauma, make a good deal of fuss over the one who was hurt and ignore the biter. Giving the biter attention would reward the undesirable behaviour. If your child’s biting is motivated by attention, you may need to find positive ways to give them the attention they are seeking.
You need to be aware of the likelihood of your child wanting or needing to bite. Check for teething time. Watch your child when other children are near. Your child may want what they have and will attempt to take it by biting. If this happens, stay calm, remove your child from the other and use words like "NO BITING". Distracting with other toys can also be useful. Biting the child back to 'teach' him/her that it hurts is foolhardy and may give the child the idea that 'you bite me, I am allowed to bite back'.
Children at toddler age understand, but do not have SENSE. Try not to be too disheartened that your child is a biter. It is the age of 'see it, want it and it is mine'. You will not instill the concept of ‘sharing’ for quite a while yet, never the less, use language and demonstration to promote sharing. If you have a ‘biter’ and the child is in day care, ask the staff how they handle ‘biters’.
Tags: 
